Urban Toledo GangThis is wierd…

It’s that time again, folks, where we answer your letters!

Dear UTG,

I enjoy your piece of work, regards for all the useful articles.

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Well, SCIB, I’m glad you like our work and find our articles useful. We may not put out much, but I’d like to think that the UTG is about Quality over Quantity!

Thanks,
UTG

Dear UTG,

Popcorn is low in calories, but rich in fibre. You will be amazed at how filling it can be. However, eating buttered popcorn will not have the same results as eating plain popcorn.
Almonds and Walnuts
Almonds and walnuts are great for the health and will keep you bubbling with energy for much longer than other foods. They provide you with the needed fat, protein, minerals and micronutrients that are need to help you burn calories and stay fit.
Low-Fat Dairy Products
Consuming foods rich in calcium will help prevent the release of calcitrol in the body, which is a hormone that stimulates the storage of fat. Go in for dairy products, but choose the products that are low in fat, such as low fat cheese and skimmed milk. Apart from adding to your reserves of calcium, it will also help you burn fat.
Fatty Fish
The omega-3 fatty acids that are present in fatty fish actually helps boost the metabolism rate and reduce cholesterol. Since fish is also a rich source of protein, it can be beneficial further in breaking down fat cells.
Disclaimer
Our products are not destined to treat or cure any disorders. The contents of our [ED: Link Redacted] are intended for informative purposes only. All the above mentioned details are knowledgeable information. These are simple advices and personal opinion and are not medical advices or care methods. The reader is requested to consult a professional to relate to his condition before the usage.

-PJTommy

Dear PJT-

You are correct, and that is why we here at UTG only eat nuts and low-fat dairy. I’ve heard about these fatty acids and I know that a lot of doctors say they are good for me, but unfortunately we here at UTG have a strict no fatty rule. Thanks for reading!

Gettin’ hungry up in hurrrrrr,
UTG

Dear UTG,

Hands down, Apple’s app store wins by a mile. It’s a huge selection of all sorts of apps vs a rather sad selection of a handful for Zune. Microsoft has plans, especially in the realm of games, but I’m not sure I’d want to bet on the future if this aspect is important to you. The iPod is a much better choice in that case.

I Like Apple,
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PFDB-

You may be correct, but have you considered using the Creative Zen? It’s the shit!

-UTG

UTG-

Hello intelligent points [RE: Subject: FWD: 1. New Rules for Urban Toledo Gang E-Mail Correspondence]. Why didn’t i consider those? Off topic a little, is this web page pattern from an bizarre config or do you use a customized template.

-financial advisor

FA-

I don’t know why you didn’t consider these points before. The rules about genital pictures are probably the most important. As for site design, it’s a little of this and a little of that. I’m sure with some practice, even someone who is a Financial Advisor would be able to create a site like this one.

-UTG

Dear UTG,
What a rubbish. How can you call it a website. Change the style, so it will be a bit more interesting

Regards,
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Dear WEO,

We can’t please everyone it seems. You must be a professional web designer, and I would not be surprised if this is why you are so hard to impress. I’ll bet you can’t pick out good stocks and bonds to save your life, tho! I think we all play to our strengths, and obviously ours is content, not design.

Thanks for writing, even to criticize!
UTG

Dear UTG,

Hey everybody!

I’m planning a vacation to Israel this summer so i wanted to ask what is the scene like with regards to escort service in Israel? I’ve go through many posts from all over the web but i could not obtain a lot of information on the topic. Anyways, are there any strip clubs? are there any escort girls in Israel whatsoever? any suggestions how to locate escort service in Israel?

EDIT:
I’ve stumbled upon this escort angecy that provide [Escort Service In Israel] [ed: Link Redacted], but I dont know if the photos are authentic? what’s your opinion, any advice?

Thanks,
Rinitelones

Dear R-
We here at UTG don’t have a lot of experience with escort services. We are nearly always knee-deep in pussy and the thought adding to that wet lake is not exactly our idea of a good time. that said, those pictures look pretty authentic. We’d hit that.

Thanks,
UTG

Countless lives were lost, and one would be hard pressed to find a soul not touched by the Great American Thread War, yet until now there has been very little said on the subject. In writing this book, The Great American Thread War, Vol. 1: The Opening Volley through the Ten Troll Years (2019-2047), I hope to finally chronicle the first years of the struggle. Today, the War (as it is most often known, and so I refer to it in this volume for the sake of brevity) is still fresh in our minds. The brave young men and women who were fighting in Europe, Russia, Mars, and yes even our homeland of North America, and were lucky enough to escape the fates of many of their fallen comrades have only recently returned.

Were it possible, I would love to tell the entire history of the War now, but there is simply too much to do so in one volume. While this first volume is being published now, I have plans for eleven volumes to follow. I hope to also release a thirteenth volume containing the entire text of the Thread to End All Threads with commentary, but until I am able to do, this first volume will have to do. In it, I attempt to explain not only the meaning behind the Thread but also the cultural context from which it sprung. The contemporary reader may find it difficult to understand exactly how the War began without knowing what sort of underlying forces were at play in those times.

As such, I begin with what is now widely considered to be the true start of the battle, at Post #12. The First Eleven posts are covered within this first section as well, but mainly to give context to why User MasterHalo69 first declared User BasketballGRRL a “fagot nazi fag”. While the Fagot Nazi Fags were a major player in the War, it was not until 2132 that they were able to conquer the moon and bring prominence to their cause, and as such I do not cover the sect beyond its very beginning. This will be a subject of one of the later volumes I previously mentioned.

It is my intention to be as factual as possible, but much of the Ten Troll Years is lost to history, beyond what we see in the Thread. While many of the years 2037-2047 are unknown to us, I use many established sources and even other historians to help piece what we do know together. I believe that when I waver from pure fact to more speculation, it should be easy for the reader to tell. I would hope that this volume is not judged prematurely or inadequate because of such an approach.

Finally, I think it is important to enjoy reading about the War. While much is hard to stomach, a person can take great comfort in the years of peace and prosperity that we have now entered into since the Internet was turned off, and is only learning about the War and not being bored by such a great stretch of our history that will stop us, lest someone somewhere tires of his or her life, and decides to Log On Line again.

Roberto Twilight LOLCatson III, phD. 12 September 2478.