Hi,
What up guys. Cole, here. I was just listening to New Kids on the Block – don’t worry, it’s the old stuff…the new album is too popular now to be hip to listen to, although probably just as bad, which means it’s awesome. But as long as I’m here, I thought I’d transcribe some of the pages from my My Little Pony notebook you always see me scribbling in. Ah, here’s an entry of the review I made last fall of the movie Eagle Vs. Shark I wrote at the Wendy’s across from the mall while looking at fat kids:
EAGLE VS. SHARK – Movie was great. People in 80s clothes = awesome! Windbreakers=hilarious (remember to buy some from Goodwill later). Guy from Flight of the Conchords (not the one I’m bi for, the other guy). Sometimes it didn’t make sense, which is trippy awesome. Didn’t know the director, so that’s good. Soundtrack had weird music, it was amazing…i felt like dying. Didn’t know the bands, except Devendra Banhart (but I don’t like him
anymore…too popular. I heard his CD playing at Borders!) Funny animation bits that didn’t fit in were great – fuck you corporate America and all the shitty movies that just make money. Me and Jesse were the only people at the movie, everyone else was in line to see No Country For Suck My Balls Coen Brothers. Coens are such bullshit fatcats. I give the movie *. Yup, *. I’m not fuck face Ebert trying to get rich by giving my sore ass thumbs up to a shitty movie just because fucking Universal and Fox have their million dollar, Lear jet riding, martini stirring gold plated thumbs so far up my ass that I need to get people in the theater. Fuck, don’t see EAGLE VS. SHARK. I gave it *, bitch. Fuck that, 1/4 star. Don’t see this movie and turn another cinema artist into a Wes “May-As-Well-Be-Bruckheimer-I-Got-So-Much-Money” Anderson! Before you kow it, we’ll all be corporate robots working for Empire Ford-Starbucks and watching McDonald-Paramount pictures that are all the same with Hallie Berry and Will Ferrell starring in romantic comedies about lovers fight space aliens and sucking Bush’s dick. Fuck this review, I’m going to Buffalo Exchange and buying a pink t-shirt because I’m not letting society dictate to me that pink is for girls.
Yeah. I was going through some hard times back then. Luckily Lex at AlteredNatives Music got me into some Icelandic music that was recorded in bathroom stalls like 30 years ago and then remixed last year by some Europop dudes and accompanied by an orchestra. It pretty much saved my life because it was so beautiful. Well, gotta run…me and my vegan girlfriend are going to make buttons that support Ron Paul for president because it is so ironically hilarious.
